Review: Formula Wears Thin In Rude, Crude 'Clerks II'

'Clerks II' (R) (out of four)

I've seen comedies in recent years that have, for better or worse, described the life of Kevin Smith. Sadly, most of them are funnier than he has been as of late.

Back in 1994, against all possible odds, Smith's black-and-white "Clerks" found a spirited band of fans, among them Miramax's Harvey Weinstein. The rest is now part of Hollywood legend, as "Clerks" was picked up by the independent movie house and went on to became the very first Sundance sensation.

Through the years, one teenager after another has immersed himself in Smith's dialogue-laced, vulgarity-laden comedy, nodding along with a sense of humor that may have been sophomoric to the core, but also one that had a heart, and an ear for truth. Exhibit A: The infamous oral sex joke that shocked some viewers, but hit a nerve with many others who had already had the debate with friends: What counts as sex anyway?

Thanks to "Clerks," Smith got the big studio contract and the big budget to go on and direct the debacle that was "Mallrats" before returning to his indie roots with "Chasing Amy." Then came the more ambitious -- some foolishly called it audacious -- "Dogma," the more marketed and mainstream "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" (a three-ring-circus of Smith-isms), and the 2004 disaster that was "Jersey Girl."

Big-budget comedies have been made about careers like this -- about the bumbling kid who refuses to grow up, wears all the wrong clothes, and gets paid millions to do not much of anything at all. With "Clerks II," Smith makes another trip to the bank to cash a View Askew check, recycling the same characters for yet another payday.

Thus, we come full circle.

Much like Smith's characters in "Clerks II," who spin their wheels in hopes of breaking free of convenience stores, fast food joints and Jersey, only to discover that the best they can hope for is more of the same, so too does Smith's career seem stuck forever in neutral, his hand slapped whenever he tries to reach beyond the formula that was cast in stone 12 years ago.

So what you have here is "Clerks" re-mixed, reorganized and regurgitated -- something that feels and looks an awful lot like the original, but lacks any of the inventiveness or rebelliousness of its predecessor.

When we last saw Dante (Brian O-Halloran) and Randal (Jeff Anderson), they were workers at a convenience store and a video rental store. Now, a different day but the same setup: They both work in Mooby's, Smith's fictionalized McDonald's, where every customer is greeted by the cry of a mooing cow.

Here they waste away the days as they always have, Dante filling the hours with the minutiae of cleaning windows and doing crosswords, and Randal by using the joint's one computer to post insults on blogs and look up porn. Outside, the newly-religious Jay (Jason Mewes) and the religiously-mute Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) dance their silly dances, hurl their offensive insults, sell their drugs and stare off into oblivion -- just like always.

For half the film, we're watching the same setups build up to the same payoffs we've come to memorize over Smith's career. Randal's rude sexual commentary? Check. Dante's anal-retentive flailing? Check. Silent Bob's last-minute outburst? Check.

Not to mention the rampant homophobia, racism and misogyny that runs underneath Jay's male anatomy jokes, ethnic jokes and sex jokes.

Alas, there are some moments in "Clerks II" that evoke memories of the vibrant, unpredictable pulse that pumped blood into the first "Clerks." More often than not, it occurs when the story slows down enough to extricate itself from this rut of obscenities and permit a conversation to take place.

Take Randal's ribbing of Elias (Trevor Fehrman), a co-worker at Mooby's, over his obsession with the new "Transformers" movie and his relationship with a girl who's a bit confused about her sexuality.

Or take Dante's behind-closed-doors talks with Becky (Rosario Dawson), the Mooby's manager, who confronts Dante about his growing anxiety over moving to Florida with his fiancée , where he'll work at his future father-in-law's car wash.

Even a three-way argument between Randal, Elias and a customer over the superiority of "Lord of the Rings" vs. "Star Wars" revives memories of Randal's classic epiphany in 1994's "Clerks," that the destruction of a second Death Star in "Return of the Jedi" likely led to the deaths of a lot of innocent workers.

But so little of the film is like this. While the first "Clerks" was crude, the crudeness accompanied the thoughts of relatively intelligent, albeit immature, slackers. Here, it is lewdness for lewdness' sake, as if Smith solved a case of writer's block by throwing anything and everything into a screenplay -- swears, racial epithets, dance sequences, bestiality, and celebrity cameos -- in hopes that something would stick.

They're all playing funny, and we're all playing amused. Those who know Smith's universe will enjoy the homecoming, like we always do, but then we'll come to the film's final shot -- an homage to one of "Clerks'" first scenes, where Dante sits bored behind the counter while a neurotic customer compares expiration dates on the milk -- and sense another opportunity missed to see Smith take the next step.

The same old kegger without the same old buzz, "Clerks II" is mostly just hangover.