Am I That Mom?

I don't want to be that mom.

You know, the one who only talks about her kids.

So when I go out with the girls, I try hard to not mix baby talk with girl talk. Sleep schedules and solid foods just don't pair well with a glass of shiraz and the latest celebrity gossip.

It's like going out with people from work and only talking about the latest projects you're working on. Who wants to discuss the pros and cons of matrix organizations over a martini? Not me.

I recently was faced with this dilemma when I went out with a group of my friends for my birthday. My M.O. was to attempt to have an "old school" night out -- dinner and dancing. I even tried to dress the part: New jeans, high-heeled boots and a cute top that was a throwback to my single years. Overall, I looked somewhat respectable for a new mom who works part-time and just landed after a three-day business trip.

I was ready for a babyless and work-free night.

We met at a wine bar in a hip neighborhood. At the table were some of my new-mom friends, some married friends, some work friends and some single or engaged friends. It was a proprietary blend of my old and new life.

As we adjusted to the bar's wood-paneled walls, happy to be away from the garish-orange interiors of kiddie gyms, we began to peruse the menu. I looked over my new mom friends, finally with hair done and heels on. One claimed she had never seen me wear lipstick before. We ordered wine and appetizers.

Then things turned from sexy to stagnant.

Me: (sips wine, eats some brie) NMF across the table: "So, tell me, what foods have you started Junior on?" Me: "I really like the Cabernet, what did you get?" NMF: "Well, I talked to the doctor and he said not to start meats until 8 months." Me: "This parmesan is to die for."

Discussing the varietals of meat infants can and cannot eat was not what I had planned.

I craned my neck to hear how my single friend had landed a hot date last weekend and tried to listen as my other friend described a fabulous pair of shoes she just bought.

But as the conversation bounced from pureed chicken to the hotties sitting at the table across from us, I found myself more and more drawn to the current rather than the past. And as the hot button topic of baby-proofing came up, my attitude turned from "old school" to feeling just plain old.

I thought as I sipped my Merlot, "How did it all end up this way?"

Would I really rather talk about burps and poop than the gossip rags? When did buying a fashionable pair of sweats matter more than a cute "going out" top?

Was I really becoming that mom?

The dilemma was cast in a new light. I like to play dress up, but I am much more comfortable without the red lipstick and tight jeans. The complex bouquet of my life suits my palate just fine.

Sara R. Fisher is a new mom trying to look hip, work hard and raise a child -- all at the same time. Her column appears every other Thursday. You can read more from her at her blog, Self-Made Mom.