Battista's Just Fine, Not Fine Dining

LAS VEGAS -- Battista's Hole in the Wall has been around for more than 30 years, so it definitely qualifies as an "Institution."

The traditional Italian eatery, which opened in 1970, has gained a reputation as one of those only-in-Vegas experiences that many will insist you must do at least once, while others shrug and move on to the buffets. We're somewhere in the middle on the whole thing.

The place certainly is colorful. Located just off the Strip behind the Barbary Coast at Audrie and Flamingo roads, the plain exterior belies the almost manic clutter that you'll find inside. Pictures of the famous, nearly famous, and "who-the-hell-is-that?" adorn almost every square inch of the wall space, along with knick-knacks, stuffed animal heads, doo-dads, and a gigantic miniature liquor bottle collection. It's sort of like the inside of your crazy Aunt Edna's house -- you know, that delightfully batty woman with twelve cats who wears tin foil on her head every night when she watches "Wheel of Fortune" to block out the lewd suggestions Pat Sajak keeps sending her through the TV.

Suffice to say that fans of clean and simple will go nuts in this place. You have been warned.

And just in case the decor doesn't keep you awake, there's also a wandering accordion player who will happily launch into whatever tune you throw at him.

Several small dining rooms surround a central hall, and each features the menu emblazoned on the walls. It's pretty simple really -- fixed-price meals range from $17.95 to $33.95 and include garlic bread, minestrone soup or salad, all-you-can-drink red and white wine, your entree, a side of pasta if your entree isn't pasta, and cappuccino after your meal.

Entree choices range from simple pastas like spaghetti and ziti up through things like chicken parmigiana and lasagna and, the most expensive, filet mignon and New York Strip steak. Everything on the menu is traditional Americanized Italian fare, and if there's anything listed that isn't familiar to you, you've probably never been to an Italian restaurant before.

So how was the food? The word we keep coming back to is "fine." Not as in "fine dining," but as in "I'm fine, how are you?" We sampled the fettuccine alfredo, the sausage cacciatore, and the uber-traditional spaghetti and meatballs and it was all, well ... fine. Nothing spectacular, nothing leaping off the plate sending us into paroxysms of delight. Just solid, stick-to-your ribs, hearty Italian food. We've had better, we've had cheaper, but it was fine.

So Battista's Hole in the Wall really comes down to the issue of dining as "experience." Everything on the Strip has gotten so corporate and sanitized that part of us delights in going to an oddball joint like this. Especially one that is just a few feet away from places with a maitre'd who would sneer at a place like Battista's. However, if food is your priority when choosing a restaurant (what a novel concept!) then there are Italian restaurants in Vegas that do it better.

But none that your Aunt Edna would feel comfortable in.

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