Why Would Man Lie About Running Errands?

Dear DoubleTake,
One Sunday, my boyfriend of nearly three years told me he couldn't have lunch with me because he had to run errands. I ended up calling a girlfriend to go to lunch with me.
At the restaurant, we saw my boyfriend having lunch with a girl I have never met before. He got up from the table and walked toward me and gave me a hug.
He said he was having lunch with a friend he met a few days earlier when he was out street skating. She wanted to start skating with his group. He told me she was new in town so he invited her out. After lunch, he was taking her to the skate shop and they were going skating.
I told him it sounded like he lied and whatever he was doing looked very suspicious. He tried to turn it around on me saying he doesn't have to tell me every thing. I asked if he was going to introduce me to his friend. When he did he did, I shook her hand and said, "Hi! I'm his girlfriend."
That evening. my boyfriend met me for dinner and tried to convince me he was not up to anything. He says I'm supposed to trust him, and he was just trying to make a new friend.
I am not opposed to him having friends that are girls. But I really don't understand how my boyfriend would consider meeting a new friend for lunch, driving her to go shop and going to the park "running errands"? Am I overreacting?

BETTY SAYS:

Perhaps he made up the excuse about running errands because he was afraid to tell you that he was taking another woman out to lunch?

Blame our gender for the overreaction. We women can be so harsh to ourselves and each other. Then, our partners tiptoe around issues because they don’t want to face jealousy and wrath. It happens.

Trust your boyfriend on this one. He was just trying to be kind to the newbie.

That said, keep a close eye on this skater girl to make sure she doesn’t try to steal him away. But keep it to innocent spying – stalking will certainly inflame the situation.

EDDIE SAYS:

Taking you at your word that you don't mind him being friends with women and don't quietely freak out or act suspicious, then I can't see a good reason for him to not explain what his plans were.

I can imagine several bad reasons, however. You have already thought of many, I'm sure: He is cheating with her. He wants to cheat with her. He wants to keep open the option of cheating with her.

But most likely there was no real foul committed here, and no real harm. And if he did have bad thoughts, he probably will be way to scared to give it a try now.

You probably do need to close the subject with a conversation. Again, assuming you actually are cool about other women, just make it clear he can tell you what he really is up to, and don't punish the girl if they do become friends.

Do you need a second -- and third -- opinion about a problem in your life? Ask Double Take and you'll get two points of view: one from Eddie, a married family man in his early 30s, and one from Betty, a single woman in her 20s.

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Double Take writers are not trained psychologists and their responses should not be taken as a substitute for professional advice. Double Take reserves the right to edit submissions.